Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I could fuck to npr.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
