wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize