i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
