it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
