what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
