? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
Randomize
