I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
