Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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