Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
i think i just lost a toe
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize