if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Randomize
