For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize