our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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