I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
you win again, gameday.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
