New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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