if i died would you start the facebook group?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
