I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
