Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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