I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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