I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
