YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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