Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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