he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
