You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
