I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
