I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Randomize
