Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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