Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
