Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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