If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
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