Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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