And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
