I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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