Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
