If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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