So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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