You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
