I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
