with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
