That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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