Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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