you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
