quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize