wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize