i drank out of a bidet.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
