He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize
