My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
this beer tastes like vomit already
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
