So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize