I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
