Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
