i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Be still, my beating vagina.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
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