Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
